Mon 12 Nov 2007

Like many others, I can never let a Remembrance Day go by without chatting briefly with a veteran, making a donation, and picking up a poppy. Now you might think I’m about to wax loquacious about the evils of war and how important it is that we remember the sacrifices so many made for the freedom we enjoy today.
I’m not, because you know that already.
The thing is, I’ve got a bee in my bonnet about the poppy. I’m well aware that my concerns about the poppy are trivial in the extreme compared to what the poppy represents, but still…
…within two hours of pinning a poppy to my jacket, the darn thing is invariably gone. So I have to pick up another one, and within another hour I’ll (for example) find it on the floor of my van with the pin missing. So I have to pick up another one, and I never get around to it, and everyone around me probably thinks what a jerk, he doesn’t care about Remembrance Day, and the sacrifices our veterans made on our behalf.
But I do.
I just can’t get poppies to stick to me with any degree of committment. They stick around maybe a hair longer than my first two or three girlfriends, then they split. At least they don’t take copies of my favourite books with them.
This is what I don’t understand: we’ve been making artificial poppies for over eighty years. Okay, when I say “we,” I mean veterans. And it’s been good for the veterans; they make a bit of cash, the work is therapeutic, and so on.
But if all these veterans are going to go to the trouble of making all these poppies, why not do it right? Why not make one that can stick to your shirt for a reasonable amount of time? I’m not asking for much — just a fraction longer than a really quality network television show manages to stay on the air would be nice.
I know what you’re thinking. That maybe if I pinned the damn thing on with even a minute amount of perspicacity it would stay on. Yeah — like that’s going to happen. And I just can’t believe that I’m the only moron out there. Why, there must be dozens of us. We simply must find a way to permanently pin poppies to the lapels of morons.
Did I mention that they hurt too, when you accidentally prick yourself?
There is something to be said for driving up donations by requiring morons to constantly shell out for new poppies, I suppose. But it’s not like us morons can keep up that sort of thing forever; we only have so much earning power (we are, after all, morons).
So I implore veterans and veteran’s associations and all the sundry organizations responsible for making poppies to rethink the entire concept. Here are a few simple suggestions:
1. Provide poppies with a little thingie that you stick on the end of the pin, on the other side of the lapel, to prevent the poppy from falling off.
2. Provide poppies with two matching rare earth magnets, one for either side of the lapel
3. Provide really big poppies that you hang around your neck
4. Provide edible poppies. I’m thinking raspberry flavoured. Ideally, these would not come with pins.
(Oh, and I get that I’m completely missing the point…)
November 12th, 2007 at 12:45 pm
Yeah veraly lead the way oh great Mahoney … I went throu 4 poppies this weekend. At a Toonie a shot, I think the legion did well by me.
November 12th, 2007 at 4:16 pm
Easy solution Joe - a little bit of tape wrapped around the pin behind the poppy and she’ll never fall off. Or, frankly, come off when you want it to. Sometimes I bend the pin back upon itself, but half the time this just makes it hang awkwardly when it tries to jump off my coat…
November 12th, 2007 at 9:28 pm
Stick a bit of eraser on the pointy end, or a little Canada pin through the middle, you know, the one with the back on it. Not rocket science. Leave the poor veterans alone.
November 12th, 2007 at 9:35 pm
Yes, Andrew, you understand! Mike, that’s a good idea, except I never have tape on me when I get my poppies. And Littlest Sis, you’re right, it isn’t rocket science, but don’t tell me you skipped the part about me being a moron…? Good advice, though… from now on I will carry little bits of eraser on me ALL THE TIME.
November 13th, 2007 at 9:28 am
The Royal Canadian Legion has this to say about using the Canada Flag pin (or any other pin) as a means of securing the poppy;
“It is the position of the Legion that the Poppy is the sacred symbol of Remembrance and should not be defaced in any way. No other pin, therefore, should be used to attach it to clothing.”
I generally try to ‘weave’ the pin through several layers of coat material - it holds well.
But Joe, you are absolutley right. The Poppy falls off faster than maple leaves in a November windstorm.
November 13th, 2007 at 9:49 am
Hey Joe. I actually haven’t used it myself, cause for some reason I actually manage to not lose my Poppy on a regular basis, but I have seen people use earring backs or tie pin backs to hold the Poppy on. I’m sure L.’s got some backs that no longer have earrings to go along with them…..
November 13th, 2007 at 11:49 am
yesterday i was at a veteran’s celebration
and my mom and I took my dad. he was an
emotional little guy. i suppose that is
what happens when he got drafted for WWII
as a chinese citizen for the us army and
was able to become a us citizen. but anyway…
the point of it was I met a lady who served
in the british army and her husband in
the canadian army of WWII. that was a
highlight for me because i’ve never met
a vet from another countires army.
the last poppy i got had a piece of floral
wire that you can attach it to anything.
November 13th, 2007 at 2:17 pm
Hey Joe,
I remember that when I was a kid the poppies were of felt, and then cardboardy felt and never fell off. I used to pin them to my lampshade every year and had at least seven.
This year, I didn’t even seem them anywhere. I guess I wasn’t in enough big malls but alas I didn’t even find one to buy and lose.
November 15th, 2007 at 2:08 pm
I hear your frustration, Joe. I lost only one this year. Not bad. I guess I’m only somewhat of a moron, then.
But when I purchased my second one I was at a veterans table, not just at the drug store, so I got an “In Flanders Fields” bookmark along with the poppy. A nice little bonus, eh. I have it pinned to the partition next to my desk… where it will hold a lot better than the poppy on the lapel. But I keep trying!
Tom